STEROTYPES AND STIGMAS CLINGING TO INTERRACIAL DATING

The context of interracial dating is no new to any country in this world, ‘Like attracts like’ we get attracted to another when we find something admirable about the person; we should feel ourselves in them. Basically, a woman would expect her soul mate of their choice to be good looking off course, responsible, respecting and trustworthy and none of these characters have anything to do with the colour or race of the man. Every living creature has something acceptable and admirable. Then what is the big deal with racial stigma? Isn’t love colour blind? What’s wrong with white men looking for black women?
Nevertheless, yes, there are some stigmas, we do face some psychological stress at points when we are about to take up our relationships beyond dating.
Parents are most concerned about their child’s future and they do have a second thought when it comes to dating beyond races, here are some reasons why parents are reserved against interracial relationship
•    Fear and/or ignorance of the other culture
•    Concerned about the maturity level of their children to accept such relationships
•    Peer pressure and  pressure of approval and acceptance in their own society
•    Some negative experience they came across from an interracial relationship

“She might not know the implications, she is young” – a caring mom

•    Fear that it may cause cultural clashes between families and/or couple
•    Fear that their grandchildren’s future
•    Conventional, cannot accept certain radical changes
How to handle the parents if they are NO to such relationships would depend strictly upon your age, maturity level, and level of independence. If your family has reservations about your mate, feel comfortable to get their reason and try to have a mature discussion with them.
Easy to solve
•    Find your family opinion and evaluate the people in your family as soon as you contemplate interracial dating.
•    Keep the communication open with both family members to understand the people for and against it
                “I told my dad about her, and he said ‘it’s OK if you are truly committed’”- A student
•    Arrange both the family discuss and interact with each other
•    Be stable and strong in the relationship
•    And be confident about yourself and your relationship

Yourself,  yes apart from the parent’s pressure, the younger generation themselves at times hold them away from other races, the reasons maybe, either they are so adhered to their ethnicity or they do have fear coming out and exploring a new aspect of a relationship because they may feel safe within their group or may be due to peer pressure.
A relationship blooms with the delight of finding someone we have a spiritual, mental and emotional connection to. People generally are attracted to those who are similar to them. This compatibility in character can be beyond colours, culture and countries, You should choose a person who compatible in love and affection and not in colour, There is nothing beyond this little sapling of stigmatization in peoples heart for interracial dating, pinch off and throw them out, embrace the beauty of two people falling in love with each other’s heart — not their ethnicity.

Character beyond colour - true expectations of every woman in an interracial match

What do any women expect in a relationship in her man irrespective of physical appearance, ethnicity and social status?

To be respectful:

Love and respect are directly proportional to each other, It is more important to respect a person you are committed to maintain a healthy relationship and to honour and respect the other person’s feeling and intentions to stay connected in a lifelong successful relationship.

Some Afro-American women are happy about the respect and importance they get in a relationship with a Caucasian man, which they feel it is sometimes denied in their same community and “black white dating” is considered a threat to culture.

Some statistics states in some Caucasian woman, the thought of Asian culture and male dominance keeps them away from Asian men.

To be trustworthy:

Trust is the key element that has an important role in building a relationship. Love may have been the key to starting the bond, but being trustworthy yourself, and completely trusting your partner will be one of the things that make it last for long. In a trusting relationship each partner is committed to being honest with one another in their dealings, they rely on each other to be open and abstain from cheating. There are several interracial singles dating site which offer free chat, forums, blogs, etc..

Some research points the rate of long-term relationship between a Caucasian woman and an Afro-American man is low as compared to it between an Afro-American woman and a Caucasian man due to the aspect of being honest and trustworthy

To be Responsible:

Responsibility is being accountable. It is measured as trustworthiness; the trait of a person being answerable to someone for something or being responsible for one's conduct. A man's worth is valued by his sense of responsibility. People believe an important task cannot be completed by an amateur, as commitment being most important in life a woman will not give it to an amateur, We put our trust only to people that can be trusted and works for women too.

Men brought up in a closely knitted secured family are more likely to take up the responsibility of the family making their environment secured and comfortable to live in.

To be stable:

As love matures, relationship stabilizes. A stable relationship can be maintained by being honest with each other, trustworthy, and having an open communication with the partner, understanding and respecting the other’s feelings. Feeling responsible in a relationship helps keep the commitment for a long time

To make them feel secured:

Yes, woman at some point would truly calculate how her man could make her feel secured emotionally socially and financially, it is a soul responsibility of a man. Not just from romance partners but we expect family members and friends to provide an emotionally comfortable and secured environment.

To be smart and good looking:

Looking good off course is a criteria woman would see in men and that is not predominant, but still would expect being mentally smart. Women are attracted to a man who is good-looking but when it comes to being in a committed relationship, a woman would expect her man to meet all the above needs. It is important for a man to have these qualities to have a successful long-term relationship.

Myths and facts about interracial black white dating

Myth: It is not a committed relationship



Fact: Commitment stands with the maturity of the individual and the compatibility between each other. Black women want to meet white men and they have a very understanding relationship and true friendship combined with a lovable bond for each other. This breaks the taboo that interracial relationships are based on mere physical attraction or just a casual and at the same time a non-serious relationship. Moreover, these fantastic couples are found determined to live in a committed relationship to prove their critics wrong.



If the fact that difference in behaviour and attitudes between two people of different races may break the relationship, then every individual has distinct character and attitude, when we bring two people together it is impossible that they are going to act and behave the same way in every situation.



Myth: Being a multiracial couple, we do not believe in our own culture or dissatisfied with our own race



Fact: That is not true, though there are some who exclusively prefer dating outside their race or in some cases people may find unique qualities in certain races that they do not find in themselves that does not mean that they are dissatisfied with their race or ethnicity.  In common, people are simply trying to find their most suitable soul mate regardless of the race; it is because they consider the connection with their soul mate more than anything else does.



Myth: Interracial dating is always between a black person and a white person



Fact : No, Interracial marriage is as common as any other marriages all around the world, they are more common even in the eastern part of the world and there are statistics of interracial relationships between Japanese and African people too, a child born to an African and Asian is called a Blasian.



In US , due to the painful history of slavery and the taboos that accompanied the institution, still the words black and white strikes their mind when it comes to interracial dating. According to a survey, the most common interracial relationship is white men and Asian women, while the less common interracial relationship is found to be between Asian men and black women.

Myth: We do not think about our future or our children

Fact: Right from naming the child to its living environment a biracial kid is given the chance of understanding their heritage and culture a high priority. The child born from multicultural couples would gain a knowledge value in multiple cultural perspectives and will be able to get along with people of more than one racial group.  The parents will also understand about their own sense of identity while they are bringing up their children that would in turn help both the parents and the children. Children from interracial marriages are no longer denied the same benefits and privileges as the children prior to Loving.

Myth: Interracial dating is morally and socially unacceptable

Fact: Interracial relationship is morally and socially acceptable, in the book of Exodus God had pre-ordained the marriage of Moses, his servant (Jew) to his wife Zipporah (Ethiopian) before they even met each other. People of older generation will believe that our society will not accept such interracial relationships, but they have closed their eyes against the fact that it is gradually becoming more and more accepted socially.

Myth:  joining just to change the social status

Fact: If this is the case, interracial dating is not the only platform. The idea of acquiring economic or social advancement is deplorable to those seeking connection and companionship with their mate. There are quite a few dating sites for white women and black men and the relationship can be kick-started here. Sounds interesting?

Myth: We do not care about their family and their social life

Fact: More than any other couples, multiracial couples are forced to face a lot of psychological distress both within their group and from outside world too, as they have an responsibility to face and solve the disputes arising between two families and two different communities, the worst part is their most painful shots are not from their own disagreeing family but from a stranger’s annoying looks.

There is no mistake in a couple who see commitment and love beyond races but it is the view of the society that stands a barrier for interracial couples to lead a normal happy life. They do have every right to live life as happy as any other loving couple.

INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT INTERRACIALSHIP DATING

Eastern culture and interracial dating

The widely spoken context of African- American and Caucasians dating is relatively less while considering the majority of dating patterns among every other community in US.



· The painful past of African slavery in United States had become a stumbling block in the way of Afro- American and Caucasian interracial dating, but some people who now claim themselves as pure Caucasians might have a history of African blood in them and some people who claim themselves a pure Africans might even have the history of white blood in them.



· Though the concept on interracial dating grew up only after 1968, there is an everlasting history of interracial relationship existing in every culture around the world



· The increase in rate of immigration to western countries is a good chance of increase in interracial relationships because there is a perfect interracial match



· Countries with enclosed system of languages and customs are less likely to be a part of interracial dating



· London, New York, Sydney, Singapore and Rio de Janeiro are the cities considered to be the best places for interracial dating throughout the world



· There were strict laws against interracial dating in every part of the world which were broken in course period of changing generations



· Still in suburbs of some south Asian countries the parents of interracial couples would sacrificing their children for their pride of race and religion in the name of ‘Honour killing’.



· Western countries takes the pride of having high rates of interracial dating compared to eastern countries, Europe and US being the highest

· Many people in today's dating pool are themselves children of parents of different races; the chance of mixed race population is rising to 50% in the same period of time. There is evidence of these children being more successful, in spite of the difficulties they are expected to face in the social environment

· Unfortunately, stereotypes and untrue assumptions based on racial believes stands a point in interracial dating  such as Asian women being more submissive, Latinos women are thought to be more passionate and fervent. A relationship build on this basis makes dating a disaster.

· Despite the racial stigma being common between older generation even youngsters in some part of the world are still ignorant about interracial dating and do have ideologies against such relationships. Some studies show that youth from higher income families are slightly less likely to date interracially. The search option in websites for white men dating black women is an add-on to search and compare partners for those who are in need

Interracial relationships around the world – black and white dating free

Eastern culture and interracial dating

AUSTRALIA

Australia is a multicultural continent where dating someone special of a different ethnicity is no longer uncommon. They date people as individuals depending on whether they are great people and how they behave. They don’t believe being specific about getting married to one's own racial or religious group, and thus why interracial marriages increased quite lots in past few years in Australia

JAPAN

The demography and the language of the country may contribute a barrier to interracial dating. People with high population of same race and ethnicity with considerably less number of foreigners and even lesser of those who can speak Japanese is a huge factor, why there is so little interracial dating in Japan. There aren’t really enough white foreigners to make it a common situation. But there are still evidence of interracial dating between Japanese and some Asian people and African people too.

ASIA

There are some strict reservations against interracial dating among communities in parts of south Asian countries, the parents of the couple would readily disown their children if they find them to be in such relationships and there is concept of at most cruelty called ‘Honour killing’, sacrificing their child for the sake of religion or culture still prevailing in suburbs of some south Asian countries. However, interracial relationships do exist around the Asian countries from ancient history until today. Relationships do exist between Asian and African people. The child born between these two races is considered Blasian. The minor population of Asian community in western world are also a part of interracial dating in that part of the world.

The central world

AFRICA

As like any other countries Africa does have some stereotypes about interracial relationships, dating beyond the black community is considered disrespect to their culture and ethnicity, but the history depicts higher population of mulatto throughout Africa mostly the results of interracial relationships between Arab and European men and black women. For the African community in US, due to the painful history of slavery and the taboos that accompanied the institution, most people still think in terms of black and white when it comes to interracial dating. In reality, black white dating and marriage happens less frequently than it does with other ethnic groups.

EUROPE

Europe as a whole is a multicultural place, with immigrant cultures included. The people are more open minded towards interracial acceptance. European countries are few among the top list accepting interracial dating and relationships.

The Western world

AMERICA

Interracial dating in the western world really is not what we expect it to be, there are still those who are opposed to interracial couples and there are communities that reject it entirely. People’s strict adherence to their ethnicity and race, fear of accepting a mixture between culture, social and peer pressure and racial ideologies are still part of some western lifestyle that stands a strong barriers for interracial dating, the black and white dating is still a stigmatic issue. Nevertheless, the most common interracial relationships between American exist between Caucasians and Afro-Americans, the European- Americans and Asians, Afro American’s and Spanish Americans, and rarely between Afro- Americans and Asians.